Seinfeld isn’t for everyone. That’s a fact I must accept, even though the series created by Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David is my all-time favorite show. A lot of people think Seinfeld just isn’t funny, or they can’t get beyond how horrible the characters are. For me, Jerry (Seinfeld), Elaine (Julia Louis-Dreyfus), George (Jason Alexander), and Kramer (Michael Richards) being such jerks is part of the appeal. I want to see what kind of trouble they get themselves in and the comeuppance that finds them in the end.
No sitcom has ever made me laugh more than Seinfeld, but I’ll also admit that not every episode is a winner. For example, “The Puerto Rican Day” isn’t just offensive (it was even banned from syndication), but it’s also rather boring. Still, I can watch those lower-quality episodes, with one exception. Season 3’s “The Dog” isn’t offensive at all, but it’s just so absolutely boring and irritating that I’m fine with skipping it whenever I come across it.
‘Seinfeld’ Featured a Few Pets in Storylines
There are not a lot of pets seen in Seinfeld. That’s a good thing, as these four would be some of the worst possible pet owners you could meet. Still, that doesn’t mean we never see a dog or a cat. In the very early Season 1 episodes of Seinfeld, Kramer actually had a dog before it was written out as if it never existed. Later, he has a cockfighting rooster named Little Jerry, but thankfully, no one else decides they need a fluffy friend.
George is too neurotic to ever have a pet (he was shown being scared of Kramer’s dog), Jerry is too clean to put up with the mess, and Elaine, you get the impression that she usually doesn’t like animals all that much. In “The Wink,” she is driven insane by a barking dog to the point of having it kidnapped and moved. In “The Slicer,” she is kept awake by the next-door neighbor’s cat that won’t stop meowing. She does have a pet goldfish in “The Parking Garage,” but when they get lost in search of Kramer’s car, the poor little guy doesn’t make it. But it’s not always bad, such as when Kramer takes a friend’s dog, Smuckers, to the vet in “The Andrea Doria.” He’s doing this not to be kind but because the dog has a cough similar to his, and Kramer comes up with a scheme. If he can get meds for the dog, he can take them, too, without going to the doctor.
What Happens in the ‘Seinfeld’ Episode “The Dog”?
Seinfeld‘s most grating episode might be the reason why the Seinfeld four are against pet ownership because it’s there that they meet a pooch so annoying that it not only frustrates them but the audience, as well. “The Dog” was the fourth episode of Season 3. In it, Jerry is on a plane, where he is seated next to a drunken old guy named Gavin (Joseph Maher). The man speaks about his dog, Farfel, who is also on the plane. Jerry is asked if he has pets, to which he replies, “Just my next-door neighbor.” Moments later, Gavin gets sick and is attended to by the flight attendants. Worried about his dog, he asks Jerry to take Farfel and watch it for a day or two while he’s in the hospital.
For some reason, even though he doesn’t want to do it, Jerry agrees to take Farfel. We never actually see the dog, but its incessant barking is non-stop. Back at the apartment, Jerry is screaming at the dog to shut up. It has ripped up Jerry’s apartment, and he’s so stressed from watching this dog for three days. He can’t even go out to do stand-up. Elaine is amused that Jerry has to pick up dog poop when he takes Farfel for a walk, but with Gavin not having called, Jerry is considering taking the dog to the pound. Things are so bad for Jerry that he can’t go to the movies with Elaine and George because he’s so worried that Farfel will have an accident on his floor. George and Elaine are forced to hang out alone, but they have nothing to talk about without Jerry there. While that has potential, it doesn’t produce much in the way of laughs.
Jerry eventually finds out that Gavin has been out of the hospital for days. He’s excited to take Farfel to the pound, but Elaine is scared that it will be put down. She’s concerned enough that she agrees to watch the dog so Jerry can hang out with George. That ends up being a disaster, with Elaine being driven to near madness by Farfel’s barking. In the end, Gavin returns to collect his dog, and it’s insinuated that he was taking some time away from the barking lunatic. Jerry tells Gavin that he never wants to see him or Farfel ever again.
Related
Even as a Huge ‘Seinfeld’ Fan, This Offensive Episode Is Hard To Watch
The iconic NBC series ran right over the line.
How Did Larry David Write This Mess?
Everything with Farfel is very annoying, so you might think Kramer’s infectious personality will pick things up, but he’s no fun in “The Dog” either. His subplot has him ready to break up with a girlfriend he can’t stand. He spends every moment complaining. One scene has him actually screaming at his girlfriend about how awful she is before getting even louder when he begs to be taken back. That’s not the Kramer we love.
It’s hard to believe that Larry David wrote this mess of an episode. In Season 3, Seinfeld was still finding its way, but that’s not an excuse because, in the next two weeks, they would air back-to-back classic episodes, “The Library” and “The Parking Garage.” “The Dog” is simply a horrible misfire that should have never been greenlit. The joke is that the dog is horrible, but where’s the comedy in that? Everyone who meets the dog can’t stand it, but that’s not a barrel of laughs. And although it’s clever, I guess, that we never see the dog, its barking will have even the biggest animal lover wanting to tear their hair out. This is not only because it’s non-stop at times but because the barking sound is produced by actor Tom Williams. That dang dog ruins everything. Seinfeld‘s usually fast, snappy comedy beats keep getting messed up over a dog barking track. It kept me on edge and is not the comfortable, relaxing watch I seek out when putting on the show.
Then there’s Gavin himself, who is one of the most unlikable one-episode characters in Seinfeld‘s history. There is nothing redeeming about him, and it’s completely implausible that Jerry would agree to watch his dog. Just as Kramer would never be so horrible to someone, Jerry would never be so kind to a stranger. Gavin could have been dying at his feet, and Jerry would have stepped over him to get away from any sort of kindness or responsibility. When Gavin returns at the end of the episode, he’s shaking and slurring his words more than ever while he talks about having Bell’s Palsy. Are we making fun of his condition? It all adds up to create one of Seinfeld‘s worst episodes. Not all of them could be iconic, but this one is just frustrating and grating. I say skip it. Your nerves will thank you.
